This past week has been spent with some supposed friends of the family. Apparently, one of the visitors knew my grandmother really well back in Hong Kong since they were both wee little ones. Anyways, she decides to come over with two granddaughters and visit for a week. At last, there was reason for my dad to clean up the pig sty of a condo! But, leave it to him to do a half-assed job. Sigh.

So my grandma’s friend did not speak a word of English, and I could only pluck the faintest bits of what she was saying. I had to ask my dad or the granddaughters for translations very often. Even still, communication was very broken and messy. It was horrendous. At least the two granddaughters spoke English fairly well, though I worked most of the time anyone was around. Let me just say, it’s quite interesting to see two people hard of hearing, both suffering from various stages of senility, talking in a foreign language.

Today I got a random call from Paul to go see a Jays game. What better day to see the Jays and the Expos?! Unfortunately, we got a bit out-played and lost 4-2. 🙁 I really hope they can get everything together and continue their winning ways again.

Right now, I’m pushing about 40 hours without sleep… I spent last night reading and messing around on the computer and, when my alarm rang at 6am to get me up for work, it occurred how late (or early, depending on your perspective) it actually way. I nearly fell asleep at work a couple of times, and at the game a couple of times. But I’m surprisingly awake now. I should figure out how to make myself tired. Although I may not feel it, I know my body is in desperate need for sleep. Perhaps I will finish the book that I’m reading: Mere Christianity. It’s not the most enjoyable of reads, but it really makes me think. And thinking makes me tired. And tiredness makes me sleep. Sleep good.

I’m sure there are plenty of other things that I was meaning to say on here, but I think it’s understandable that they are escaping me at the moment. Overall, things have been going pretty well and I’m still toughing out a challenging summer. I truly hope that things are going well with all of you. I always try and remember all of you in my prayers; I hope that you keep me in yours. God bless.

Today (well, yesterday to be entirely accurate) was the SARS concert– Concert for Toronto. A whole host of bands were playing in the two biggest venues in Toronto and I was really, really excited to go to the show. Since Our Lady Peace was playing, I naturally invited Kristin to come watch with me 🙂 Although things were a little rushed and even distressing towards the last couple of days before the show, it turned out to work out well for everyone. Thank God!

Let me start out with the very beginning of the day. I wake up for work late (by 45 minutes.. d’oh!) and I hurry to shower and brush my teeth. I keep in mind that I have an email from Kristin with a phone number I should bring along. Rush rush rush: out the door, and down to the car (which I miraculously borrowed for the day.. Hey there’s a first for everything! Thanks, Dad!!) and zoom to work. I arrive at work only to realize that I didn’t copy down that phone number. D’oh again! Work is dull as usualy, but at 10am, I go to Ticketmaster to try and land Radiohead tickets. Nope… not even 20 minutes after they went on sale, ticket quality turned to poo. I wasn’t willing to dish out some $70 to be ridiculously far back. Somewhat dejected, the rest of the work day lulls by with the promise of seeing Kristin again keeping me excited.

12:30 and work’s done. I head downtown on the highway, and traffic is absolutely horrendous. I get off and take city streets, and that was equally miserable. Needless to say, getting downtown took a lot longer than originally anticipated. Finally, I get to the downtown core at about 1:20, 10 minutes before I was supposed to meet Kristin. The first three attempts at a parking lot were greeted with the omnious “Lot Full” sign. Blah. Finally I decide to go to the SkyDome and use their parking services (much to the dismay of my wallet). By then, I’m late. (Sorry, K!!)

Run run run… up the stairs, and nearly falling UP the stairs twice. Yeah.. smooth. I emerge into the gorgeous day a couple of gates away from the meeting point. Unfortunately, I was surrounded by mobs of people and wouldn’t have a chance finding Kristin inside the crowd. I walk slowly looking every which way, taking notice to a girl running towards me, her smile beaming. Ahh, success! We head to the gate, enter, and wait around for the concert to start.

And now, the review:

Swollen Members started off the concert, and, if there is any one word that I can say about these guys, it’s simply amazing. These guys are so talented and their ability to write unique, meaningful songs is incredible. I can’t wait for the opportunity to see these guys again; they stole the show.

Next came Glenn Lewis from the ACC. His voice was really bad, and he paled in comparison to Swollen Members. Next!

Sum41 came on stage and played their hits. I was astonished by their maturity and demeanour. That lead singer of theirs is actually quite intelligent!

Remy Shand performed next via the simulcast. I am really lucky to have gone to the show because I got introduced to the fantastic and inspirational music of his. He put on a quality show!!

Finally, it came time for Our Lady Peace to hit the stage! I was really disappointed with this performance; the music was pretty bad and nothing really stuck out as being exceptionally good. The crowd was pretty dead for these guys…

From the ACC, Jann Arden took to the stage. She tried to be funny, but failed miserably. Her music wasn’t much better than her attempts at humour.

The last act that we saw (in near entirety) was Avril Lavigne. If anyone has ever said that she’s really good live, take it with a grain of salt: her voice was off key, and there wasn’t anything that brought her show to life.

Now if you’ll do me the favour of taking the exact opposite of everything I said in this review, that’d be great!! I will put it very bluntly… Swollen Members is the worst group I’ve ever seen live; they seemed to have played one long, continuous, crappy song. Glenn Lewis has a great voice; if I was into that kinda music, I’d probably listen to him more. Sum41, mediocre with their music, acted like a bunch of twelve year olds. Remy Shand got unnecessarily worked up with his crappy music. He was groovin like he was much more than a sub-par performer. OLP was really, really good. Although Raine was a little off key to start, he got a lot better as he warmed up. The music stayed close to album versions (they played songs from Naveed to Gravity, including one that we’ve never heard before), though drumming was particularly good. My personal favourite was Starseed + Life. Kristin’s would probably be Clumsy 😛 Jann Arden talked a lot more than the others.. she had a duet with Sarah McLachlan which was really good, too. She’s also the only one that was able to make everyone laugh. Repeatedly. Finally came Avril. My gosh, she can sing: she hit every note (even those really high, piercing ones that you can hear for HOURS after the show) without any signs of trouble. Furthermore, she was the only one who, from what I noticed, played different versions of songs (i.e. not in the same style as what has been released). Kudos to her on that. Oh, and I should mention that she did indeed play Sk8ter Boi, much to my embarassment and Kristin’s enjoyment. That was actually kinda fun cuz it brought back some.. interesting.. memories. 🙂

By the time 6:30 rolled around, we had to go since Kristin had to catch the train back home (snif). Finding the car required asking one brainless employee, asking another group of employees, and enduring a very hostile elevator operator lady. Holy! Thus concluded the best (and loudest) part of my day. Best part of the past little while, too.

After I dropped Kristin off, I made my way through stifling traffic to Paul’s barbeque. I didn’t eat or drink much, and spent most of the evening chatting it up with my old buddies from St. Mike’s… all the while, I had an annoying, persistant, high-pitched staticy noise in my ears…

I can’t wait until next time… 🙂

It should come as little surprise to find out that I’m not having the time of my life right now. My lack of enthusiasm for posting here, the distinct absence of cheer in the posts that I do make, and frequent prayer requests are telltale signs that I’m embroiled in many heavy issues.

Simply put, there are lots of holes in my life that have appeared in the past couple of months. Big, gaping holes. I am missing very significant pieces that once made up a happy, complete person. To add insult to injury, it seems, I know precisely what caused this, and I am powerless to stop it. What, you may ask, could possibly lead to such a catastrophic breakdown? Well, just being where I am is enough to do it. Ever since I left Waterloo, things have not been the same: I am distant from the positive influences that shaped my life and, without them, I lost much of what I gained.

Things are quite lonely in Toronto. Since my dad moved to this middle of nowhere, I’ve had few places to go and even fewer people to see. Without a car, I am condemned to spend the majority of my free time at home, a place I absolutely hate. When I’m not at home, I’m probably working, another place that I absolutely hate. I am not happy where I am. Granted, I have to be fair to my friends in Toronto, those to whom I talk on a regular basis, at least. But because of the aforementioned problems, I hardly ever see them.

I must say that my existence of late has been rather miserable: my life consists of doing things that I hate. But don’t get me wrong; it’s not like I’m letting these things happen without a fight. I have fought really hard to hold onto the missing pieces of my life, but the forces were too strong. Even now, I’m trying to get at least one piece back. A few days ago, I went to the bookstore and got a few books that will hopefully inspire me. I read a bit into two of them each day. So far, however, I don’t notice much of a change. While I was at the bookstore, I noticed a bookmark with a nice inscription: “All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” St. Francis of Assisi said that. It came conveniently after Kat told me that other quote about the valley of the shadow. I can’t help but feel, however, that there is no candle right now. I feel as though I am blinded by darkness. While I do have hope for better times, things continue to be bleak.

The summer is just trudging along now. Once filled with hopes of being a fantastic summer, I feel that this has been a bit of a disappointment. Yes, there have been times where I did have a lot of fun, but I would be foolish to deny the pain of being alone here. I cannot see what life has in store for me, so I don’t know whether to have my arms open or to brace for another hit. So, I end this post with another prayer request; I need all the help I can get in these difficult times.

Serenity now.