Devoid

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No footprints found in the snow
The way ahead is unclear
Even the air is weeping;
Dense fog obscures what is near

So much is yet to be seen
So much inhabits my dreams
They lie listless, unfulfilled
They’re devoid of life it seems

My life is starved and thirsty
The cold sinks into my heart
Truth, beauty, and love, I seek
Yet we’re still worlds apart

Then I catch a glimpse of you
So graceful, loving, and pure
You enchant even the scornful
My patience needs to endure

Yet my eyes rarely meet yours
The air between us is gray
Are you even looking now
Or am I too far away

Our dance is a paradox
So near and yet very far
But I won’t lose faith in you
Regardless of where you are

One day I hope we’ll realize
The potential that can be
But until I find out how
Please don’t forget about me

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Was this about a girl? Or God? Or something else? I don’t know. Maybe a bit of everything?

I’ve been having a hard time shaking off the feeling of loneliness. Yes, that kind of loneliness. While I don’t need a serious relationship in my life, I often wonder how great it would be if I did have one. I really want to share my life — my whole life — with someone.

But, to be very clear, I’m not going to share it with just anyone.. while I am impatient in some respects, I don’t think that I’ve lost sight of my principles. So despite my desire for something more, I have been very mindful of the patience I should have towards this. I dunno.. maybe I’m being too selfish?

I wish I could think more clearly about this. My brain is pretty toast after a couple of really long, intense days. Maybe that’s why this is hitting me the way it has been recently. Ugh. This sucks.

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